Relationship Psychology of Men
What Do They Want? What Do They Expect?
What men are like in relationships
The relationship psychology of men has been described as tending to include
- being afraid of getting trapped, smothered, controlled
- wanting to solve problems, be helpful, move on
- not naturally focusing on process or feelings
- having internal dialogue that is not about process or feelings
- being afraid that if he does share feelings, worries, fears, he will be looked down on, making the relationship worse not better (There is research that supports this fear by the way.)
Terrence Real on men's issues
Terrence "Terry" Real wrote a groundbreaking book about male depression and men's psyches in general titled I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression
that opened up a whole previously hidden realm of what was going on inside men. Here's a short video of him describing what he found. I hope you enjoy it.
Relationship Psychology of Men Is Not Necessarily the Relationship Psychology of Any One Man
And, even if they are all true and you are in a relationship with a man or you are a man in a relationship and you don't like how it is going, what can you do with this knowledge?
For starters - what is is. Even if you want to go somewhere else, you have to start where you are, not where you wish you were.
If these particular gender specific behaviors and beliefs are bothering you, a good place to start is with Byron Katie's four question approach described in detail in Loving What Is or the guided attention breathwork in Michael Brown's The Presence Process for some help with cleaning up your own emotional charge about being with a person who does not see relationships the same way you do. Then you can going ahead with working on specific issues with your partner with a reasonable chance of success.
While there is no easy fix, no panacea, when the tendencies of the relationship psychology of men is causing problems and/or confusions, it can be very helpful to know where they are likely to be coming from.
The formula (if there is one) is to
- study up on what a man is (you are) likely to be feeling, wanting, expecting about relationships in general
- do your own work on feelings that this brings up, whether that is your reaction to your partner or your own reaction to the suggestion that you should somehow be different about this
- review the concept of stages of relationships
- with a clean and positive mindset, honestly and effectively communicate about the specifics
Return from Relationship Psychology of Men to Relationship Psychology
The Missing Link In Every Relationship?
Sex? Communication? Romantic Dates?
All these things are important, but a breakthrough new video reveals the surprising factor that can make ALL the difference in a relationship and few, if any women (or men) are even aware of it!
The key is understanding men on a deep emotional level, and how the subtle things you say to a man affect him much more than you might think.
If you're frustrated with your man going cold, losing interest, or pulling away, then this video is a must watch:
Click Here
To Discover What Men Secretly Want, But They Could Never Tell You.
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